boyfriends

I've had boyfriends over the years.  Some guys I was really interested in and some so so.  I did have a few girlfriends too starting with one that was Italian but after we moved (family) to the west end of the city where I lived at the time, we grew apart.  When we re-connected, the fire was gone, it had fizzled.  A few others later were more interested in others.  One was even interested in married men.  All this put me off.

As for guys, I'm really into them, especially if they are hot, have a pleasant personality and so on.  There was one in the 1970s that I was interested in but he seemed to be more interested in someone else.  Then there were a couple of other guys while I was going to university in the early 1980s.  One was married, so he was excluded but another wasn't but he didn't give me any direct signals (or even vague ones), so we parted.

I had one while I was living and working in Toronto.  In the end, it was his drug habit and the fact he couldn't control his intake of alcohol either plus he was prone to being violent when drunk that I ditched him and moved back to London (Ontario) where I had lived for years.  I wasn't about to settle for abuse!

Then the most recent one is a work in progress.  There is some time, not a lot, but some.  I hope he can get his act together because I really do love him like none of the others before him.  But its better to have loved than  not at all.  That's what we have all heard over the years.  So, there's still hope all things will work out for the best in the end.  I'm an eternal optimist, well, its better than being a pessimist.

So, how's your love life, guys?

~ Volker

Ben II

This evening on the way home from work the train was reasonably full considering the time.  A young Asian guy sat down next to me and was seated checking out his smartphone for most of the trip toward New Westminster.  At one point toward the end he got up and then sat down across from me.  Then another young Asian guy sat down next to him.  He must have gotten on the train.  I was dozing off now and then but when I looked up again, the two of them were holding hands.  Lovers no doubt and certainly both very  good looking!

That's a photo of Benjamin Godfre above.  So, what interesting things have you seen in your daily life? I'm sure there's something!

Have a good night, guys!  - V

thoughts on Brad

This isn't Brad but model Josh.  I spent a long time thinking about Brad last evening and this morning.  There isn't a day that goes by where my thoughts aren't with him in some way.  I wake up in the morning to one of his images posted up in my bedroom and also the same image as a wallpaper on my computer.  And I'm sure his thoughts are on me as well even though he can't communicate with me directly.  Easy access to a computer would solve that but he doesn't have that option at the moment.

We are both friends on Windows Live where he is my only favourite and also linked on my family listing.  I consider him like family anyway and treat him as such.  Its an awful thing to be from a child from a divorce, tossed from one parent to the other and then left to fend for himself.  The friends that I know that come from such circumstances haven't fared all that well in life, and its not confined to friends.  I have family members from similar circumstances, half-siblings, so I know better than most what he might be going through.

All that aside, where Brad lives jobs are difficult to find (the east coast of Canada, Nova Scotia in fact).  That's why many leave for central or western Canada in order to find employment and make a life for themselves which is what I've been trying to convince him to do, with my help of course.  I shoot off some funds now and then as I can afford it.  Keep in mind that I am still trying to get my own finances in order after the mini-stroke I suffered back in May.  It was around that time that I heard from him last.  I guess I would best describe myself as a father figure in his life.  Like every true father would I worry about him.

I suspect from his life experiences to date that Brad has trouble trusting people.  I mean, his very birth parents have let him down.  The reasons for that are varied and many I am sure but someway we have to find a way out of this mess.  Everything that I've promised, I have honoured, so at some point I hope that he will open his heart to trust the very person that feels the most for him.  This will certainly help him with other relationships.  We don't live in a vacuum, you know!

What I'd most like to do is wrap my arms around him and give Brad a great big hug letting him know that I love him and that I'm there for him.  Mere words are not enough.  We have a world full of people from different walks of life that say many things and never live up to them, politicians in particular.  Its action that gives it all meaning.  So, Brad, if you or someone you know has happened upon this post, take the time to comment.  You'll long not forget it.!

Be kind and forgiving of people.  Life is like a stage as Shakespeare pointed out.  We come, play our part and then exit.  While we're here (physical presence on Earth), we learn from our experiences and others learn from us, or so it should be, so those are some of my thoughts for the day.   - V

love

Some time ago I presented a post entitled "define boyfriends", so I managed to find a Corbin Fisher photo that "defines" that post in the form of a t-shirt with those very words on it. There are a couple more CF images to put us in the mood. Take the time to show your appreciation for your significant other, whether male or female, regardless of the sexual orientation. We all deserve to be loved! And while you're at it, enjoy the awesome bodies on these guys. Something worth getting excited about alone, don't you think? - V

love and what it all means

With Valentine's Day coming up on Friday its a good time to discuss the subject of love. When I was young I wasn't one to follow convention and give cards to the opposite sex only, in fact in the 4th grade I gave cards to guys that made an impression on me. Looking back at all that, I guess that's not at all "straight" is it? Why should we exclude potentially half the population in letting others know that we care about them. Why wait until they pass on to express how we feel about someone.

Love takes many forms, from romantic love to sexual and a myriad of other forms. There is the love shown between parent and child, between grandparent and grandchild, between friends (same or opposite sex) and so on. So if I love a someone of my own sex, a guy, why shouldn't I tell him and show him my appreciation?

I love my good friends and I still love Brad very much and demonstrate this as often as I am able. Currently, its as one friend to another, one human being to another, but it can take any form he likes. Simple, deep friendship is a great start, don't you think? Some of us just need time to flower and show how we feel. I'll have more on this as we progress into the week. Just some thoughts for you guys! - V

"Like a Brother"

Today I was watching a few dvds I hadn't seen in a while. The most recent one was the film, "Like a Brother" or "Comme un Frere" in French. It is in French with English subtitles and available from Water Bearer Films. The two lead characters are Roman, played by Thibault Boucaux, and Sebastien (a.k.a. Zack), played by Benoit Deliere. Check out the film's trailer here! I really don't want to give the story away but all I can say is its worth watching if you like to understand more about relationships, gay or straight! Relationships can be complicated, regardless of the sexual orientation, especially when we don't understand ourselves. Let me know what you think. - V

define boyfriends

Yes, define boyfriends! I let mine know in no uncertain terms how I feel about him and what is to happen to make things work for both of us. There's no confusion in my mind and there shouldn't be in his. The most cherished and wildest of dreams will come true, even trips to far flung places around the globe. Hope he's here soon because I truly love him!!!
To add a little inspiration to all this, here are some images of Jerry East by the excellent photographer, Dylan Rosser. And there's more from other photographers below. Enjoy, because I sure am!!! - V

tenderness

Affection, caring and tenderness shown to a lover, what more can one ask for? The honour and respect each partner shows for each other has no bounds, neither through distance nor through time can love be abated. The sandman spreads his dream sand wide and far. Sleep my friends and dream, dream of your heart's greatest desire so that those thoughts most precious may become reality! - V

love

What would the world do without love, love of self and love of others? Its an essential part of the human experience. What are your thoughts?

That being said, its been an interesting week. Tuesday evening as my train was heading home, I looked to the north and saw a double rainbow! This was as we were heading into Metrotown station. There was a disk-like cloud cover above us extending to the Coast Mountains to the north and to the west-southwest there was an opening in that cloud cover allowing the sun to shine through. A light rain dropped from the clouds allowing those that took the time to see a view of the double rainbow above Burnaby Mountain.

Most of the week was a dull, overcast type scene. Today, Friday, was different in that the the sun came out and the sky cleared. By afternoon it was a clear blue sky! The weekend, especially Saturday, appears to be warm and very spring-like. So, how's the weather where you are??? - V.

love

"Love is an undulating energy that moves through you, within you and radiates out of you and changes everything."

- Bartholomew

Davey Wavey explains Sugar Daddy relationships

break the illusion

I found this post from Davey Wavey over at Break the Illusion interesting and his explanation even more so.  Check out the video and then go over to his blog to comment.  Meantime, that makes me think about the relationship I have with Brad.  He’s younger and certainly good-looking and I’m older but certainly young looking than most my age.  I wouldn’t call myself rich in monetary terms but I am as far as life experience and my general outlook in life and how I treat and react with others.  Is this a Sugar Daddy relationship with me as the Sugar Daddy?  Perhaps.  I see a lot of potential in others that perhaps they don’t see in themselves.  My focus is Brad as far as relationships are concerned.  So what does he see in me?  We’ll have to have Brad post his thoughts in order to understand our relationship from his perspective.  For that, we’ll just have to be patient!  But Brad did indicate to me recently that he was going to post again.  Give us all space and time!  With patience, wisdom and understanding, the unimagined is possible and we may be pleasantly delighted in the outcome!!!  Yes, I’m an eternal optimist.  Well, its far better than the reverse!- V.

Tomorrow May Be Too Late · by Thomas Marino

Tomorrow May Be Too Late · by Thomas Marino

This is a short video clip about a book called “Tomorrow May Be Too Late” by author Thomas Marino about his coming to terms with his sexuality.  Check out the video and read further about the book by accessing his website.  Now that I’ve said that, I should order the book myself, read the book and follow along as his life unfolds.  - V.

Clara Sheller - season 2

Extrait Clara Sheller, Saison 2
by GayClic

Clara Sheller, saison 2: Lez Hard at "Desirs & Emois" posted this video on his blog, a mix of interesting photos, video clips and commentary. He is bisexual, versatile, a non-conformist, atheist that is into the arts, gardening, music, swimming, diving and other interests but I digress. Watch the video!

Will and Dave answer questions

Will and Dave answer questions: Have a look at this video clip on gay relationships and other interesting topics. Dave is says it like it is, very provacative! Check out his blog at http://www.breaktheillusion.com for further videos and interesting comments. And check out YouTube for these clips and others. Search for" wickydkew"l or "davey wavey," Enjoy Dave's videos! - Volker

Waiting

There are good things, very exciting things that require time. Patience is something that I have in great abundance, not to mention gentleness! So while I'm waiting for Brad to arrive from back east, I am just getting over yet another cold. This is the third one this year if my memory serves me correctly. My allergies are likely being triggered by the dust from the construction site near work (I'm allergic to dust) and with the cooler nights the mold spores in the air are likely proliferating (I'm allergic to three kinds of mold spores). All that aside, I am getting over this cold. The worst is behind me though and now I'm just coughing up phlegm as the body tries to rid itself of the cold virus and regain health. Stress levels have been higher than normal waiting for Brad to show. Concern for his health and well-being is top on my list. A simple email or IM does wonders to relieve the concern for a partner and Brad has done that and more! All will be well for both of us once he's here. Then we can settle down to enjoying each others company as I take photos (and perhaps he does the same) and he does what most interests him. We can share each others trials and tribulations, benefitting from each others strengths and share the joy of discovery together. The mind dreams and then we make these dreams reality. Without dreams what would life be like but an empty existance, just plodding along without hope. We aim to show you that dreams are not only possible but more than just attainable, they will give others hope as well and inspiration to follow their own! Keep following!!!- Volker

Fritz Wunderlich sings "Aennchen von Tharau"

Fritz Wunderlich sings "Aennchen von Tharau" in this video clip. The words to the song were originally written by poet Simon Dach (Memel, 1605-1659) in Low German (Plattdeutsch) and later translated into High German (Hochdeutsch) by Johann Gottfried Herder in 1778. In 1636, a 17 year old named Anna Neander was getting married to a minster, Johannes Partatius. Simpn Dach had been invited to the wedding, fell in love with the girl and was inspired to write the poem. A statue was erected in Memel (now Klaipeda, Lithuania) in 1912 but was lost during the First World War. Exciled Germans and Lithuanians from the region erected a new statue of Aennchen von Tharau in 1989. This is the statue you see in the video clip. I chose this clip because it also has an English translation. - Volker

Roman and Deniz - Episode 452

I've been watching episodes of Roman and Deniz from late afternoon into the evening today. This episode must be one of my favourites. Look for the scene with the photo shoot featuring Deniz shirtless. He's so cute with or without his clothes plus he's got that angelic face. Check it out. - Volker

Bodywear

For a while I've been thinking about what to get Brad that would convey how I feel about him in love and affection. ChoKerz4men.com offers some inspiration in this regard. Have a look at their website. Meantime, perhaps the images above may inspire you as well. The hot, sexy models certainly help! - Volker

Work ahead of Brad's arrival

Well, I am up earlier for work in the morning (Thursday) to work an extra hour (nine hours as opposed to eight). Then next week I am working 8 am till 4 pm on Tuesday which is Canada Day, a statutory holiday in Canada celebrating our country's birth as a nation. Once Brad arrives, this overtime work will be very limited so the two of us can spend as much free time together as possible. We will be working together, not just living together. Brad touched on that in his post. The money from the overtime work will be very useful at time and a half (plus time on a stat) but our relationship is as important if not more so. There has to be a balance in life. Besides, the photos taken of us will be useful for our work together which is enjoyable in itself. There is so much that the two of us plan to experience together, some of it pleasurable work and some of it solely fun and pleasure! What more can I say! We are both looking forward to this opportunity with great anticipation.

Aside from work, there is so much to do ahead of Brad's arrival "home!" I am so looking forward to his arrival. I have to head off to bed but there will be more later. - Volker

P.S.- I did email a photographer friend of mine in Los Angeles about Ethan Reynolds a while back. Sent another reminder this evening. Perhaps Ethan will write when he is willing and able!

Joy

Over the last few days, well since Thursday of last week when our communications resumed with Brad's return from sea, we have been in daily contact by msn, email and also have tried the phone though my phone seems to have a loud crackle on the line. I'll have to have a phone technician look into this. Last night Brad tried phoning but storm with plenty of rain and lightning seemed to have other ideas.

So now not a day or night goes by where I am not thinking of Brad. He is on my mind even at work lol. I am providing what assistance I can to help him move west and am so looking forward to his arrival. He is surely to receive a great hug and more from me when he does! I will more than just say in words how I love him but also in action. I've got to get ready for work and am not even dressed yet. More on all this later, perhaps this evening! - Volker